Where am I?

Elevator etiquette.  Not one of those classes that I have ever seen offered in a college course book but maybe it should be part of the ‘required courses’ that so many colleges are pushing these days.

I am approaching the elevator this morning at work.  We have 2 side-by-side.  Drink in 1 hand, bagel in the other.  I walk up and push the button as I can see one of the elevators (enclosed in plexiglass) is waiting to be used.  2 seconds later the guy behind me walks up and presses the button trying to call the other elevator down. 

Umm, hello?  Melvin.  Do you not see the marvel of engineering sitting right in front of you.  Oh, sorry, I must have blocked your view when I was just pressing the button 2 seconds ago.  Please forgive me.

The doors open and we both walk in.  Being that we are only a 4 story building it is pretty common for most people going to the 2nd floor to take the stairs.  So I ask; What floor?

4.

No “4 please.”  4.

Ok, I am only going to 3 so I press both buttons and up we go.  Dinging once as we pass the 2nd floor and again as we approach the 3rd floor.  Just before the doors open I step forward to walk out and as the doors open Mr. Oblivious walks out at the same time. 

Now before I go off on another rant about him being a jerk I must tell you that the elevator in our building goes through a set of meeting rooms on the 3rd floor and only the 3rd floor so it is noticeably darker on the 3rd floor when you get off than any other floor.

Mr. Pushy gets off and notices the darkness, spins on his heel and barks at me: “Why did you let me off on the 3rd floor, I wanted to go to the 4th floor?”

Hello Mr. Oblivious (yes, his name keeps changing); do I look like am an elevator operator?  Or maybe just the fact that maybe I wanted to get off on the 3rd floor and you are just an idiot?  Did that thought ever occur to you?  Obviously not.

He storms back into the elevator and stops stunned when he notices the 4th floor button is still highlighted.

And of course then presses it a few more times just to make sure.

Course grade: F 

You fail sir. 

Next time take the stairs.  And just a piece of advice.  You can use them to go UP AND DOWN too.

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